Trapped3

When pedestrians see you riding a fancy car,most of them wish they are in your shoes little do they know that I'm willing to give it all up just to be happy. That is why money never buys happiness. For the past 25years things have seemed great. Beautiful family,lovely wife and children. I've achieved a lot but I'm not proud to call myself a man. In the past six years I've not been able to perform sexually. I've been medically declared abroad as impotent and my status can't make me confide in anyone. . Does anyone even have the idea of what it feels to spend almost every night with their wife and not be able to perform? For a man its like becoming barren and powerless,it strips you of everything that makes you a man. I try so hard and it hurts my wife so much that she starts to rain abuses on me and naturally I loose control and give her the beating of her life even when I know my children are aware of how I maltreat her. Perhaps that's why she insisted on sending two of my children abroad for holidays,so they won't witness their dad beating their mum. I love my wife and children but I just can't help it. Sometimes I feel like God doesn't recognise me after how I've been faithful to him and done his bid. Yet I have no one to talk to and no one to share this with,people just envy you and wish they had your seemingly perfect life. Beneath all the smiles and fancy suit is a wasted and hopeless man.
 I jolt back to life as I hear d sound of cars honking behind me. One motorcyclists yells something at me but I can barely hear him. If only he knew how much ild be willing to exchange lives with him just to be happy and fulfilled. I might just end my life tonight so my wife can have someone better to be a husband and father to our children,I wonder what would be said of me "PASTOR AFTER PREACHING THAT GOD ANSWERS PRAYERS COMMITS SUICIDE" not really a bad title right? Just few hours left.

Always remember that people have greater problems than you. Even those you least expect. Be thankful.

 Happy New Month xx